WHAT on earth do you mean by that, dear blogger?
Recently I’ve heard two different people talk about their minds “grinding” obsessively about shit they cannot control. I love that word – grinding – it’s perfect.
The obsession of what could be, will be, or worse, should be will drive us mad. I tell people constantly that we have to let go of how things should be and accept how things are.
I do not have control over anything except my reaction to whatever or whoever is in my orbit. That’s an excellent and challenging piece of reality in my life. Knowing that has brought me back to the here and now regularly, especially, when I begin to eye someone else as the villain – and myself as the victim.
Some days I want to villain-ize anyone else so that I can go back to bed and pull the covers over my head. Shit can get so real so fast – and I sometimes do not feel equipped to handle it. (That’s usually when I realize that I am not meant to ‘handle it’ – I’m meant to be present and live through it.)
So I do not plan for the future, but rather I decide upon a general direction and open my mind and heart to the adventure that develops as I move forward. For someone who has lived with the illusion of control for a lot of the nearly 6 decades I’ve been alive, that is an amazing choice to make – one fucking day at a time!
